Monday, May 30, 2005

Poem: A Mother's Prayer

A Mother’s Prayer
By Victoria Carrington

Lord, look after my babies
Hold them close to you
Fill them with your love and joy
Show them what’s right to do
Keep them safe from harm, Dear Lord
Protect them with all your might
Keep them on the narrow path
Keep them in your light
Especially when times are hard
Never let them give up hope
Let them know if they follow You
With any problem they can cope
Lord, thank You for these gifts
You have sent me from above
Let my babies always know
They have my unending love

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Rainbow Parties

As if I need another great blog site to read. But the Blogger News Network does have a lot of great stories. I submitted my first story there today, a previous post of mine titled, Urgent Talk to Your Teens About Sex.

This is in part a response to a post at the Narrow about a book about Rainbow Parties, a favorite sexual escapade of kids left alone without supervision for hours at a time (read-most kids in America). Brief overview of Rainbow Parties: They involve girls, lipsticks of varying colors, oral sex and a proud penis.

Michelle Malkin refers to the book, with it's brightly colored lipsticks innocently portrayed on the cover, as 'Educational' Smut.

Parents and others want to condemn the book (and rightfully so) but the more difficult task parents face is talking to their teens about abstinence and sexuality and supervising their teens more closely.

It is relatively easy to get emotional and start talking about boycotting bookstores or publishers. It is quite another thing to change your work schedule or curtail your evening activities to spend more time with your older children.

Believe me, when I worked as a psychiatrist and gave parents these simple suggestions to help them deal with behavioral or emotional issues with their teens, you would not believe the looks of disbelief that I would get.How dare I ask parents to change their lives to accommodate their children!

Anyway, enough of me on my soapbox.

Find out more for yourself if you are interested.

Abortion is Wrong: Even Children Know It

Chase, at age 4, already has commented on the sin of killing unborn babies. This issue came up as we were reading a book about sharks who cannibalize their unborn young.

Chase is fascinated by biology. He wants to know how everything works "on the inside" and I have been more than happy to indulge him in this unit study. Along with books from the library, I purchased a book from Sam's Club called "Uncover A Shark" by David George Gordon, a 3-D book with a model of a dissected shark inside in layers.

Apparently, unborn great white shark pups become cannibals and eat the unfertilized eggs in their mother's womb as they are waiting to be born. I tried to skip over reading this part but it did not work. Chase saw this and became very upset. "That baby shark is eating the mommy shark's eggs. That is not right, mommy! That is wrong! There could be a little baby shark inside that egg that will not be born if the other shark eats it! The one baby shark is killing another baby shark!"

"You are right Chase. Some things happen in life that are just plain wrong."

I did not know what else to say.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

"Being a God Chaser and Kid Chaser"

How can I do it all? How can I pursue my spiritual growth, utilize my God-given gifts and raise my family in a way that is pleasing to God all at the same time? I pray about this quite a bit and have had counsel from some wise ladies about this issue. But still, I struggle.

I was recently blessed with a book called "How to Be a God Chaser and a Kid Chaser" by Tommy Tenney and Thetus Tenney. Read my review of this book at my Work-at-Home Mom Blog.

Any tips from other moms trying to do the balancing act?

Importance of Creativity

I forgot to mention in my previous post about Preschool Essentials the issue of creativity. I would add to my list encouraging creativity as an important part of early childhood education. I was considered a creative child. I liked to write and tell stories. Through years (many years) of formal, intense schooling, I "lost" my creative abilities. My husband loved to draw and was quite good at it as a kid but he too seemed to 'lose' some of his creative abilities. My husband and I decided very early on that no matter which type of curriculum or educational approach we used, we did not want Chase to lose the creative abilities he was born with. So far, God has blessed Chase with an incredible imagination and the ability to make up games, stories and even his own toys for hours on end.

Only recently have I come to fully appreciate God's desire for all of us to be creative. He is, after all, the Father of Creation and the Ultimate Creativity Guide. Who needs a muse when one has the Holy Spirit of the Creator of the Universe at our disposal? I have come to understand for my own life that to have creative abilities and choose not to use them is a sin.

After years of ignoring any creative urges and practicing delayed obedience to God ("I'll work on becoming a writer later"), I am now walking in God's will for my life and developing my creative abilities. "God, I finally accept the responsibilities you have for me and I will devote my life to the full expression of my gifts for your glory." has become my prayer.

May I also raise my children in such a way that they will always walk within God's will and fully utilize all of their creative gifts. I pray that Chase and Alyssa will never need to recover lost creativity.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

What Children Really Need During the Preschool Years

Essential Christian Preschool

Some things are crucial and need to be learned in the preschool years. Certain foundational aspects of character, family life and self-care development sets the stage for future growth and learning. Molding your child to fare well within the family unit and within society at large as well as nurturing a love of spiritual life and a love of learning are all that your preschooler really needs. Everything else can come later. Eventually, your child will learn how to write his name and count to 100. But if you wait to inspire a love of all that is truly important, you may wait until it is too late.

I have two sisters who are kindergarten teachers. Yes, they do get children who are sometimes unprepared for the rigors of today's kindergarten. But for the child who still needs help writing his name or counting, help is available. What is much more difficult and disruptive for them is the child who does not know how to put on or take off his own coat and boots and who can not get along with peers or who seems disinterested in learning. It is the child who does not seem to know how to have fun without a television or a video game, the child who has no sparkle in his eyes, that they find especially troubling and sad.

As I am finishing up the end of the official preschool years with my son, I have been reflecting on many studies as well as my own clinical experiences working with troubled children to formulate what I believe to be essential building blocks of the preschool years.

1. Love of learning. Nurture the curiosity of your child. Experiment as requested. “I don’t know what will happen if we mix the flour and the water. Let’s try it and see.” Answer questions patiently and as accurately as possible. Thank goodness for the Internet when you need to know ‘how does God make refrigerators’!
2. Love of family. Spend time with grandparents and other extended family. Model healthy family relationships. Teach responsibility within the family unit. Encourage observation of sibling’s growth and development. Encourage love and respect for all family members. Teach family history and genealogy. Pray for family members and others’ families.
3. Learning self-care and chores. Allow your child to take responsibility for certain chores. Spend time teaching and reinforcing how to brush teeth, button clothing, and choose clothing. Kids love to help out so make sorting laundry, putting away silverware and setting the table fun and learning. Teaching the child about and seeing that they receive proper nutrition, sleep, fresh air and exercise are also important.
4. Love of the Lord. Children are very in tune with the spiritual realm and have a natural curiosity about God. Feed the curiosity and fan the flames both by example and by providing ample opportunity for the child to learn about God and his creations. Make the Bible essential reading for the preschool years.
5. Peer relationships/conflict resolution. Relationships are filled with conflict and the preschool years are no exception. Conflict will be present throughout our lives but how will we teach our children to handle it? The myth that merely being around peers in groups of 10 or 15 for 8-12 hours a day will socialize children is entirely untrue and anyone who has studied child development knows that. However, well-chosen experiences with small numbers of peers under the watchful eye of a caring adult can help children to learn about relationships. If the playmate has a toy that my child wants, how will he choose to handle the matter? He may try several approaches, some appropriate some not, to get what he wants. Judicious adult guidance can serve to point out options and help the child understand what works and what does not. This is impossible to accomplish if one teacher is caring for ten children. Children are mostly socialized by watching and interacting with adults within their family units and peer relations will flow from these experiences.

Any other ideas from you moms who have perhaps gone through the preschool years several times already? Please leave your comments. I am still learning!

Home Worship

Growing up, I learned that worshiping God was a Sunday morning activity. Of course you loved God all the time and prayed regularly, but worship was strictly reserved for Sunday mornings in a church building. Anything less seemed disrespectful to the greatness and holiness of God! How could anyone even consider worship as a home activity? I was always suspect of religious services such as Catholic mass that were shown on television. It just did not seem right to invite Our Mighty Savior into our living room!

God has worked on me in the past few years to reveal to me the importance or worshiping him all the time, everywhere, as much as possible. No matter if I am cleaning toilets in a grubby t-shirt and jeans or raising my hands high in a glorious Sunday morning service at church, worship is what God wants most from me and all believers. I came to understand that where I am and what else may be occupying me do not matter. It is just worship that truly pleases the heart of God. And because it pleases him, it pleases me as I strive to be his good and faithful servant.

How does this daily, at-home worship translate in our everyday, busy family life? First, my husband and I together started with a goal. We knew that we wanted to fill our home with reverence and worship. The simple act of proclaiming our plan out loud and declaring it to the Lord and to ourselves was the best thing that we could have done. Because we know the tone we desire, it is relatively easy for us to eliminate anything in our home environment that interferes or just does not fit. Likewise, we can easily identify what we do want as we pursue God's face everyday as a family.

Next, we realized that we wanted all of our media in our home to reflect the fact that we are Christians who love the Lord. We wanted this as much for Chase's sake as for ours. We found ourselves uncomfortable with Christians who wear offensive t-shirts or watch filth on TV or at the movies. We wanted to strive to make all facets of our family life mesh with our beliefs in God and his Word.

We listed to uplifting, inspiring music throughout most of the day, we have inspirational prints and posters, we watch educational and fun Bible videos together as a family. Of course, we each have other areas of interest we pursue but all fall within our family guidelines for media usage. Sam likes talk radio, I like oldies from the 40's and 50's and Chase likes Bob the Builder and other children's videos.

Importantly, I have my own private worship time. Either late at night or early in the morning, I spend time praising God either through prayer, writing, music, movement or some combination thereof.

I recently read the book "Throne Room" by CeCe Winans, graciously given to me a homeschool mom friend, and that book has blessed me and my worship efforts very much! A little testimony about the book: I had been wanting this book for some time but just could not afford it. I even went to see CeCe at a local bookstore and considered getting the book for her to sign and it was not available. Imagine my surprise when my friend calls and says she would like to come by and drop off the book for me because she has an extra one! And just in time for Mother's Day! God is good, all the time and he is worthy to be worshiped.

Home worship is the most important part of our family's home-centered lifestyle.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

More School Needed?

Even as these education officials extol the virtues of getting education into kids as early as possible by expanding their preK programs, other topics of interest to this district include bad behavior on buses, labeling and disciplining special ed kids and the need for more security cameras.

And parents want their children sent into this madness even earlier?

I am becoming more aware of the push of education officials to remove children from their parents at even earlier ages to try to fix what is wrong with American education and what is wrong with American education.

Their scheme to get children into their system earlier will not work. As they try to distance parents from their young children, the same forces are claiming that are educational systems would be improved with greater parental involvement. And the trend of homeschooling is catching on across the country as even Ivy League schools recognize that children educated with intense involvement of parents is good for children's learning.

So if we look at what works in education, it seems to involve greater parental involvement, not increased involvement of educational institutions. Our schools are crumbling, children are acting out, teachers are disgruntled and employers are fed up.

But we trust the educational system to expand their role in our children's lives? I don't think so.

We Went to the Fair!

We call it the Orange Jubilee and we had a great time. I love to watch my little ones laughing, playing and enjoying life. Of course, they ate too much junk food and Alyssa got pretty tired out and over-excited but a good time was had by all. I ran into some old friends and was blessed by someone I did not know who gave us some free tickets for the rides.

It was a perfect sun-kissed day here in Northeast Ohio and I am glad to be alive. I thank God for my wonderful family and the wonderful blessings he has bestowed upon us.

Friday, May 20, 2005

Why We are Homeschooling

This post over at Spunky's really got me to thinking (in the way that only Spunky can get me thinking!) about our decision to homeschool.

Although I am a relatively new homeschooler, our family's reasons for homeschooling have already evolved over the 4 years of my son's life. We practiced attachment parenting long before we even knew what attachment parenting was. We were extremely relieved to find Christians who shared our beliefs about grace-filled parenting as both my husband and I held stereotypes of all Christian parents being only authoritarian and not very forgiving, loving or accepting of their own fallibility and none of those characteristics described our views of being good parents. In fact, I can say that Satan tried to keep us from deepening our Christian faith for that reason alone. We felt that we might be treated as outcasts because we read our Bible to understand that it is discipline, not necessarily corporal punishment, that is crucial in raising children who will learn to love the Lord even when Sam and I are no longer with them. Thankfully, we found other Christian parents who felt as we did and our parenting style did not keep us from fully pursuing growing in our Christian walk.

Against the backdrop of understanding that children are a sacred trust sent from our God who loves little children, we have become more and more convicted that homeschooling is God's will for our family. The fact that homeschooling would keep us close as a family and allow us to tailor our children's education to their learning styles are bonuses. Understanding that homeschooling is a lifestyle as much as it is an educational alternative, my husband and I have sought to create an home-centered lifestyle in which our family will make spending time together a priority as we battle the forces of Evil that seek to kill, steal and destroy all that would bring families closer together.

Our greatest problem in establishing the kind of family life that we dream of has been finances. Coming from a very high income situation in which our expenses matched our income (primarily due to high student loan debt), we as a family have struggled with ways to creatively make homeschooling work for family. Our most promising approach to this situation has been combine our homeschooling with home business. We have friends who have taken this approach and not only does their family business allow them to homeschool but it also serves as a vehicle for learning for their children. Sam and I are excited to explore the myriad of ways in which homeschooling will allow us to give our children real-world experiences to contribute to their education. Although we acknowledge that any venture may have its tough times, my husband and I are very excited to be embarking on the journey of homeschooling. We hope that if hard times come, we will focus on the benefits of homeschooling for our children, ourselves and for our family as a whole.

It is difficult to summarize years of prayer, research and conversations with my husband and observations of my son as I explain why we are homeschooling. In the final examination, God has called me to homeschool so I will homeschool to the best of my ability with his guidance and help.

Journey to Motherhood Part 4

My struggles to obey God in the matters of my vocation in life reminded me of the Biblical story of Sarah, Abraham's wife, and her efforts to produce an heir for her husband. God had promised to fulfill that desire of her heart. But could she just patiently wait for him to do so? Could she wait for God, he who had promised to be faithful? No. She had to take matters into her own hands and and have Abraham impregnate her maid instead. Her actions led to birth of Ishmael but Ishmael was not the heir that God intended. Sarah ended up with less than God's perfect plan for her life because she acted outside of God's timing. I was in danger of creating my own Ishmael as I waited for God to create a family for me.

I just praise God that before I stepped out and married the wrong man or even worse decided to have children out-of-wedlock, God stopped me long enough for me to put him in charge.

Approximately 1 month after my submission to God's will, I met my husband-to-be. Within one year we were married and within 2 years we had given birth to our first child, a son. I felt fulfilled beyond anything I could have imagined. I only get a slight twinge of regret when I think of how long I spent searching for something that was so easy to find with God's help. If only I had long ago let the Lord be my light and his word a lamp to my feet. Of course, I know that all things come together for good for those who love the Lord, even those things that the enemy may have meant for harm.

My regret never lasts long. Instead, I dedicate part of my life to sharing my story with younger women, many of whom have deep, hidden desires to "just" be a wife and mother but they feel too ashamed and confused to admit it. I validate their feelings and encourage them to seek the Lord as they plan their futures. I am thrilled when I see young women walking confidently into God's purposes for their lives.

Journey to Motherhood Part 3

This post continued from Journey to Motherhood Part 2 here. Read Journey to Motherhood Part 1 here.

I knew it was God's will for me to start a family. The very important missing piece, however, was a husband. I prayed and prayed for God to send me the "perfect husband". Nothing happened. I prayed some more for God to send me the man of my dreams, my knight in shining armor. Still no results. (well, no one appropriate anyway).

I became more assertive. I let everyone know that I was looking. I went on blind dates. I even tried the personals! With every date, I felt I was moving further and further away from finding a suitable marriage partner.

God seemed silent. "How could you set me up like this!" I cried out to God. He had flamed my fires of desire for starting a family and was encouraging me to become a wife and mother. How could he refuse to send me a husband? Disappointed and dejected, I finally did exactly what God had been waiting for me to do: I gave up and gave it to all to him. I fully surrendered all of my dreams of my idea of a perfect husband to him. I really completely gave up. I prayed "God, I have no idea what to do or where to go. Do what you will with me and my relationships. My worldly efforts have failed. You take over now."

God spoke into my heart that I had it all wrong. I had been focused on finding the husband who met all of my needs. I had completely ignored the fact that I was to provide something to my future husband as well. I had not even considered taking the time to be sure I was the woman that would make a ma a good wife. I was only focused on finding a good husband to supply my needs. God wanted to send me a husband and children not just for my happiness but for my spiritual growth in Christ.

My prayers changed. I prayed "Forget all the requirements I was looking for in a husband. I trust you Lord. You choose him and I will follow. Just give me the wisdom to recognize him when he comes and make me a good wife and mother. Send me a family that will challenge me to grow."

Journey to Motherhood Part 4

My struggles to obey God in the matters of my vocation in life reminded me of the Biblical story of Sarah, Abraham's wife, and her efforts to produce an heir for her husband. God had promised to fulfill that desire of her heart. But could she just patiently wait for him to do so? Could she wait for God, he who had promised to be faithful? No. She had to take matters into her own hands and and have Abraham impregnate her maid instead. Her actions led to birth of Ishmael but Ishmael was not the heir that God intended. Sarah ended up with less than God's perfect plan for her life because she acted outside of God's timing. I was in danger of creating my own Ishmael as I waited for God to create a family for me.

I just praise God that before I stepped out and married the wrong man or even worse decided to have children out-of-wedlock, God stopped me long enough for me to put him in charge.

Approximately 1 month after my submission to God's will, I met my husband-to-be. Within one year we were married and within 2 years we had given birth to our first child, a son. I felt fulfilled beyond anything I could have imagined. I only get a slight twinge of regret when I think of how long I spent searching for something that was so easy to find with God's help. If only I had long ago let the Lord be my light and his word a lamp to my feet. Of course, I know that all things come together for good for those who love the Lord, even those things that the enemy may have meant for harm.

My regret never lasts long. Instead, I dedicate part of my life to sharing my story with younger women, many of whom have deep, hidden desires to "just" be a wife and mother but they feel too ashamed and confused to admit it. I validate their feelings and encourage them to seek the Lord as they plan their futures. I am thrilled when I see young women walking confidently into God's purposes for their lives.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Creating a "Home-Centered Lifestyle"

When my son was born 4 years ago, I never imagined how important home would become to me and my husband. After years of experimenting with various ways of incorporating more home into our lives, our family has found a radical solution that works well for us. I call our answer a "Home-Centered Lifestyle" and it incorporates home education, home worship and home business. I certainly do not claim to have all the answers about exactly how to make this work with your family as we are still a work-in-progress. But we have found a certain peace with our way of doing things despite some remaining details to be worked out. I hope that those of you who are looking to expand the role of your home in your life find some inspiration. Here is our story.

After my son was born, my husband and I realized how much we wanted family to be the center of our lives. I had recently graduated from medical school and my husband was a photographer so we felt that our family choices were very limited. Regardless of how much I wanted to stay home and no matter that my husband fully supported my desires, we could not see a way to make that a reality given the educational debt that I had accrued. So I resigned myself to return to work full-time after some time home with my new baby. But the Holy Spirit kept tugging at me, challenging me and deepening my desire to stay home with my baby.

I decided to request to return to work part-time. My request was turned down and we decided that I would not return to my old job. What would we do? We decided that I would look for part-time work and Sam, who mostly worked on weekends, would stay at home and watch Chase. We tried several variations on this theme as I took a variety of temp jobs in my field. The pay was good and everything should have been fine only it was not. I felt such a strong desire to be at home that I could not enjoy my work. Leaving my son felt like torture despite the fact that I knew he was in the excellent care of his very loving father.

The problem was, we realized, that no one could replace me as Chase's primary caregiver. My professional mommy friends who worked outside of the home admitted this to me and basically told me to "get over it". "No one will ever parent like mommy so don't even bother to look for such a person." Was this what I had to accept for my life? I decided that I needed to try to accept this fate for me and my family. It was so hard for me! It was as if I had a mommy-shaped hole in my heart that could only be filled by claiming my mommy role as my primary one, not a role secondary to that of career woman. But I felt so hopeless. I did not know what to do. I started to wonder if God could feel my suffering or if he even cared.

What had I done wrong to deserve such torture? Was choosing such a demanding profession outside of God's will for my life? Was getting married and having a child all a big mistake? Did I misunderstand what it was God wanted for me? Were the years and tears and prayers that I spent discerning what God's will was for me in vain?

I had many more questions than answers. I was falling into a sea of self-pity and self-doubt and as much as I was questioning God, I knew that he was the only one who could move me out of my current situation. I got down on my knees and started to pray. "If leaving home is so hard, why don't you try working from home?" was the answer that I got immediately.

Of course, I could not believe what my heart was saying. There are no work-from-home jobs for psychiatrists, I thought. This must be another mistaken interpretation of mine, I worried. But then my mind went back to the time that I had taken off after the birth of my son. During that time, I remembered a promise that I had made to God long ago, the promise to use the writing gifts that he had given me to glorify him. I made this promise back in college when I was choosing between a creative writing concentration with an art history major and biology/pre-med. I chose pre-med because I was told that was so much more practical with my skills and experience. I did promise God though, that once I became established in medicine, I would get back to my writing.

I had forgotten about this promise until after my son. But once I remembered I began to write and write and write some more. It was almost as if floodgate had opened up and all the pent-up praise I had for God, renewed after my experience of awe at being given the gift of new life through my baby. I had not written seriously since medical school when I belonged to a creative writing group. Was God calling me to pursue writing as a career? It made sense in light of the urging that I felt to stay home as a writing career could certainly be launched from home. I definitely felt there was much for me to write about. With my husband's blessing, I embarked on a career in freelance writing.

Thus the home business portion of our "plan" was hatched. I use the word "plan" with some hesitation because not much planning was involved. Some things fell into place and we as a family changed course. The addition of home worship and home education would enrich our family life in ways we could not yet imagine. More about those in upcoming installments in this series.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Book Reviewers Wanted for "Thinking Toolbox"

The book "Thinking Toolbox" is about logic and reason is targeted to homeschool families among other groups. Mind and Media is offering more copies of the book to review- even to lower-traffic blogs. Here is an e-mail Stacy of Mind and Media sent me about the book:

Hi Friends,

This is it, and I'm so excited to tell you that this book is of high interest to you. I'm giving the final total to the author tomorrow. So if you want a copy of The Thinking Toolbox, this is just a gentle reminder to let me know.

Send your url and address, and like I said yesterday, lower traffic is okay for this book.

See the description on www.blogforbooks.com

Thanks!

Stacy


If interested, check it out today! See my previous post about book reviewing here.

Jesus by Leith Anderson

I am reviewing the book "Jesus" by Leith Anderson for Mind and Media (see my previous post here to find out more and even sign up to be a reviewer yourself).

What a terrific experience so far! I am only at the "Wedding at Cana" but already I feel that the book has enhanced my knowledge of the Bible in general and of Jesus' life specifically.

The book details the life of Jesus by combining all four Gospels into one very compelling story. I also particularly like the sidebars that detail historical information relevant to the times of Jesus' life. For example, the author gives a detailed comparison of Pharisees versus Sadducees.

I was watching a video of the birth of Christ with Chase yesterday and that was when I realized how "Jesus" really enhanced my experience of the Gospels. As the video showed Mary riding the donkey as she and Joseph approached the inn, I could feel her fatigue, a 9-month pregnant woman, so far from home, afraid, wondering if her baby will be OK without any of her kinswomen to help her deliver her baby. This was her first pregnancy after all!

Many of us remember that nesting instinct we had in the last weeks or days of our pregnancies. In fact, traditional clinical descriptions of OB doctors call the due date the EDC or the Estimated Date of Confinement. This confinement was not meant to be some cruel act of bondage for pregnant women (despite what the feminists might have you believe!) but was meant to give a woman rest and the presence of mind to face the impending birth.

Imagine, if instead of decorating your nursery, you were traveling on dusty, dangerous trails without so much as a comfortable place to use the restroom! Remember how often you have to 'go' at the end?

I never had such a view of what Mary had to go through to give birth to our Savior.

Speaking of OUR SAVIOR, check out Mrs. Happy Houswife's blog for a great visual.

T-shirt Quilts

Hat tip to Mrs. Happy Housewife who is always full of great ideas and interesting finds comes a wonderful way to keep and display your treasured t-shirts.

A t-shirt quilt is the answer you need. This company gives you all you need to make varying size quilts from your t-shirts or someone else's to give to them as a gift.

Check it out for great examples of t-shirt quilts.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Excuse My Dust

I am switching templates. I hope this improves readability in everyone's browser. Comments are not yet fully functional. I will get back to this tomorrow. Alyssa is waking up from her nap now.

ChoosingHome.com Housewarming Party

One of my favorite websites, ChoosingHome.com, the brain child of two great blogging homeschool moms, is having a "Housewarming Party" and you are invited. See below for details or visit Molly's blog to find out more.

It's a House-Warming Party to celebrate the grand opening of www.ChoosingHome.com and you are invited!

Ok, so what exactly are we talking about here? Well, Jenna and I were looking for some articles on the topic of being at home, and thought this would be a fun way to do it (ok, actually, it was all Jenna's idea--I just enthusiastically agreed with her!), especially since we know so many of you have so much to offer women out there! So here's the scoop:

Topic: Choosing to Be at Home

Subject Matter: Anything to do with above topic.

Examples: Share your story of how you made the decision to be a "full-time-at-home" woman, tips on how to make the transition from career to home-worker, perks and benefits of being at home, difficulties you've overcome, cultural assumptions and lies about "housewives," and the list goes on... (Obviously this will pertain more to women than to men, but men are by no means excluded and are welcome to share about the importance of home life as well).

Date: June 1st will be the big "party," so be sure and spread the word. We will post the articles and their respective links on our new site on June 1st, as well as feature some in June's newsletter (also sent out June 1st).

Contributor Requirements: Article(s) can be written via your blog and the link sent our way, OR (especially for those of you who do not have blogs or websites--we really want to here from you too!) simply typed out and emailed to us. Articles need to be submitted by May 25th. Send entries to admin AT choosinghome DOT com with the following information included:

1.) Your name,

2.) Your website/blog address (if applicable),

3.) The link to your article (or the typed-out article) you are submitting,

4.) A three line "biography" about yourself.

Special Note: There will be special prizes given (award catagories are top secret--sorry!) and every participant will recieve a special *gift* from Choosing Home. Award winners will be announced June 1st on the site.


Please feel free to spread the word--the more participating, the merrier! And do let us know (in the comments box below) if you help us advertise so that we can be sure and thank you publically!

Monday, May 16, 2005

Creation Museum Opening in Ohio

Very exciting news! A Creation Museum, featuring teachings emphasizing God's creation of the world, will open near Cincinatti, Ohio.

Not expected to be fully operational until 2007, the $25 million dollar facility expects 500,000 visitors the first year. The museum will include a planetarium and a blueprint of Noah's Ark.

For those of you in the Southern Ohio area, the facility is already open for tours.

My family and I will definitely check this one out. Chase will especially enjoy it.

Reasons for Homeschooling

I find that I sometimes forget exactly why I am homeschooling. It is good to have the support of other homeschool moms to remind me. Some homeschool moms and I got together and prayed this evening and it was very powerful. The worship bought me back to basics and helped me to remember what is important.

I am homeschooling because: I feel a mandate from God to do so, I desire closeness for my family and I feel that individualized learning is the best possible learning.

There may be some other reasons such as wanting to teach my child about the Bible from a young age, dislike of public school philosophy and curriculum, concerns about safety and peer influences in public schools, the expense of private schools which may still tend to have many of the problems of public school for instance.

But my top 3 reasons, the ones I listed first, really get at the heart of the matter.

I came across a story about a Christian family who were among the earliest homeschoolers in their state. Their main reason for homeschooling was to promote family closeness because the mom had been diagnosed with cancer.

This story confirmed what the Lord laid on my heart during our prayer time about exactly why I am homeschooling.

I am grateful for the opportunity to be obedient to God and to serve my family faithfully.

Journey to Motherhood- Part 2

I had a hard time accepting what God was trying to tell me. His message for me to embrace distinctly feminine roles was in direct opposition to the values that I held in my heart. I took feminist women's studies courses in college. I knew that it was taboo for a woman to think of her role as wife and mother as being important. In fact, most of my training was an attempt to ensure that I would not be "stuck" in such menial roles. I was taught that a woman had to know herself, live for herself only and reject all societal and religious notions of what a woman should resemble.

"But wait a minute here", I found myself saying. I had done all the right things and I still did not feel so great. Single, with no decent prospects and working up to 100 hours per week completing my medical training, I felt frustrated with my life. Professionally, I was accomplishing so much. That was supposed to be my fulfillment. Why was I still so miserable? Could it be possible that God was right, I stupidly wondered. Did I really need to become a wife and mother in order to be fulfilled?

I began to pray as I had not done regularly for some time. I prayed for God to show me what roles he wanted me to fulfill. I prayed that I would reduce so that he could become more in me. I prayed that I might submit myself to his will so that I might be led to the perfect place where he wanted me to bloom. Was I to remain single and childless or perhaps adopt? Was I to pursue a religious vocation such as becoming a nun? (Yes, I was serious about that- if it was in his will). After an intense period of silence, I began to feel a sense of peace. I still did not have an answer, but I did have a sense of peace. Once I relaxed and stopped trying to figure everything out, I felt that I had received my answer.

I was indeed being called to the roles of mother and wife. Okay, God, I hear you now and I accept what you are saying. There was only one thing still missing- a husband! Now how is God going to make this miracle happen, I wondered.

Mommy Wars

Sometimes, I wonder if the emphasis on Mommy Wars is overplayed by the media. I have met some stay-at-home moms that can not stand working moms and vice versa but that seems to be the exception.

I know many more stay-at-home moms that are willing to help a working mom with babysitting in a pinch and working moms who applaud the decision of moms who stay home.

What have your experiences been?

My Journey to Motherhood- Part 3

This post continued from Journey to Motherhood Part 2 here. Read Journey to Motherhood Part 1 here.

I knew it was God's will for me to start a family. The very important missing piece, however, was a husband. I prayed and prayed for God to send me the "perfect husband". Nothing happened. I prayed some more for God to send me the man of my dreams, my knight in shining armor. Still no results. (well, no one appropriate anyway).

I became more assertive. I let everyone know that I was looking. I went on blind dates. I even tried the personals! With every date, I felt I was moving further and further away from finding a suitable marriage partner.

God seemed silent. "How could you set me up like this!" I cried out to God. He had flamed my fires of desire for starting a family and was encouraging me to become a wife and mother. How could he refuse to send me a husband? Disappointed and dejected, I finally did exactly what God had been waiting for me to do: I gave up and gave it to all to him. I fully surrendered all of my dreams of my idea of a perfect husband to him. I really completely gave up. I prayed "God, I have no idea what to do or where to go. Do what you will with me and my relationships. My worldly efforts have failed. You take over now."

God spoke into my heart that I had it all wrong. I had been focused on finding the husband who met all of my needs. I had completely ignored the fact that I was to provide something to my future husband as well. I had not even considered taking the time to be sure I was the woman that would make a ma a good wife. I was only focused on finding a good husband to supply my needs. God wanted to send me a husband and children not just for my happiness but for my spiritual growth in Christ.

My prayers changed. I prayed "Forget all the requirements I was looking for in a husband. I trust you Lord. You choose him and I will follow. Just give me the wisdom to recognize him when he comes and make me a good wife and mother. Send me a family that will challenge me to grow."

Sunday, May 15, 2005

Fun Family Day

I spent some time today just being mommy and it was great. I took Chase to the playground by himself under the (mistaken) impression that Alyssa and her tired Daddy would nap while we were gone. It was colder and windier than I thought at the park so Chase and I headed back home to put on our jackets.

Once we got home, we realized "Alyssa's Awake!" (this is Chase's rallying cry as he misses her when she is sleeping and he gets so excited when she wakes up). Neither she nor her daddy had slept at all while we were gone.

What is it they say about the best laid plans?

So, we dawdled a bit, ate lunch and snacks and then decided to head back to the park. After a little while there, I decided it was just too windy for Alyssa as she still has a little cold.

We came home and the very tired daddy was still not sleeping but was working on the lawn. The whole family just seemed to feel like being together so I suggested we take a fun family trip downtown and visit the historic Cleveland Public Library with its marble winding staircases and brass fixtures. Oh yeah, they also have a terrific software selection!

So we went and looked at the sites along Lake Erie as we went. As we got off the highway, their was a marching band in front of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and we stopped to look. Alyssa had a ball! She already seems to enjoy all things dancing and gymnastic.

It was off to the library where everyone was having a good time except for Little Missy. And if Little Missy ain't happy, Mommy ain't happy. So eventually, we had to split up and I took the kids back to the car and Sam stayed in the library and browsed graphic design books and software.

Thankfully, both little blessings fell asleep in the car on the way home and Sam and I actually had a chance to have some adult conversation. I am off to straighten up an heat up leftovers while everyone is sleeping.

Saturday, May 14, 2005

Slowing Down

Well, I finally cleaned up around here a bit. I have been writing so much lately plus helping my husband with the store so I have not had much time for anything other than taking care of the kids. Cleaning up actually is a little therapeutic (I never thought that I would say that) and I will keep working on cleaning up next week.

Lots of inspiring Christian homeschool bloggers. I have been enjoying reading them.

I am going to have to update my blogroll soon.

I am off to sleep.

Journey to Motherhood- Part 1

I have had in on my heart to write about my experiences of becoming a wife and mother and how those experiences altered my relationship with God and were affected by my relationship with God. After writing out an extended updated version a few days ago, I felt unsure about posting it for 2 reasons: 1.I thought it was too long and 2.I was not sure that anyone would really want to read it. After all it is my very personal story, probably not very controversial or exciting.

But, I have felt the urging to post it. I have ignored it until today. Kim over at AHA commented that she liked my blog but she wished I would say more about my personal homeschool. I have been feeling more like sharing more of that as well but I feel my current life might be better presented against the backdrop of my former life.

So, here goes...

I found out the other day that a young person I know, a college graduate in her early twenties, was pregnant. She was somewhat hesitant to tell me as she was not planning this pregnancy because she does not feel ready for a baby. I started to remember how I was when I was in my twenties. I was so much like many of the young women I meet today. I was scared of the restrictions and losses that would accompany motherhood. I put it off. "I've got more important things to do right now-school, career, making money. Starting a family can wait." I reasoned. I did not consider any other way.

Yet at the same time, I spent my adult years searching. I was searching for peace, fulfillment, purpose and happiness. This quest occupied much of my time outside of my training and career. Underwhelmed by my church experiences after high school, I had become a sidelined Catholic, a fairly common occurrence. So to the New Age bookstores I fled, chasing after the latest, greatest fad that would fill me with what was missing.

You know what was missing? It was not Yoga or Gregorian chants. It was not creative visualization or Native American drumming. It was not wind chimes or deep breathing. The answer came as a shock to me. No, what was missing was the very thing I had learned was taboo for a modern woman to admit longing for- a commitment to serve those outside of myself by fulfilling the womanly roles of wife and mother that God designed me to excel in achieving.

What? Find fulfillment in service? Become happy by becoming a wife and mother? I was incredulous! I began finding my way back to the God of my childhood in my quest for clarity on this issue and the Truth I had been seeking. My Father in Heaven, who had never left me said "Yes my child. It is true what you have discovered. Now you know your true destiny."

Read more in my next post next time.

Friday, May 13, 2005

Urgent: Vote No on Universal Preschool Poll

This message is from an e-mail sent to me by Dianne Flynn of universalpreschool.com.

Now, I wonder if you are aware of the preschool poll being run by the
governor of Tennessee?

Current results are 59% in favor of government preschool (746 votes) to
37% opposed (464 votes). We can surprise Governor Bredesen by changing
the outcome of his poll. :) Let him know that not everyone supports
government preschool-for-all programs!

To vote, go to Tennessee Governor Bredesen's new blog at:

http://www.tennessee.gov/governor/viewArticleContent.do?id=436&page=0


Vote today in this online, informal poll.

Thursday, May 12, 2005

New Features on This Site

I am trying to make my site as helpful to other homeschoolers as the blogs that I visit regularly. I started this blog with the hopes of serving those in the homeschool community by providing news and information that would be helpful. See my initial post here.

I came across a homeschool parent who created a dynamic list of local homeschool support groups for homeschool websites. The lists are arranged by categories (I chose the category "Christian") and by putting a bit of simple code on your site, your visitors can view the number of links that you designate (I chose 5).

Check the left lower margin for the current list of local Christian groups around the country. I will expand this if it seems like a helpful feature.

Secondly, as you can read from my previous post here, I have been blessed with the incredible opportunity to review Christian books for Mind and Media. My first book arrived in the mail- Hooray!- and I will be reviewing in the next few weeks. The book is "Jesus" and it is simply a biography of Jesus' life written by weaving together the 4 Gospels. So far, it is quite captivating! I will keep you up-to-date as I continue reading (in all my free time-HA). Meanwhile, check out the graphic of the book in the left margin if you want more information.

Well I am off to heat up dinner, leftovers, and to straighten up the house which has really suffered this week.

Finally, you will find links to our homeschool store on this blog. Thanks everyone for supporting our store! Keep this mama home and homeschooling!

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Teacher Pay the Problem?

I bet most homeschool moms, who although appreciated are unpaid laborers, would disagree with the statement that lack of competitive pay for teachers is the main cause of mediocre teaching today.

However, this article in the New York Daily News makes some interesting points about why so few women of excellence are pursuing teaching careers.

They believe the avoidance of rewarding excellence in credentials or performance practiced by the major teachers unions is mostly to blame. The authors of the study point out that before the prominence of teacher's unions, teachers who graduated from top-tier colleges were paid more than teachers from other schools.

Of course, the union officials interviewed claim that merit pay is not fair and before the unions took control and made education the heavenly realm that it is today it was merely a bastion of the privileged being overpaid while others languished in poverty.

The ridiculous reluctance of the educational elite to change anything for the sake of our children makes me weary.

Just homeschool your children people!

Monday, May 9, 2005

My New Blog

I have started a new blog at www.HomeschoolMomTips.blogspot.com My posts over there discuss issues in parenting and education with a focus on Christian homeschooling and other topics that may of be of interest to Christian families.

My husband and I have also launched a shop filled with homeschool apparel and accessories at The Homeschool Mom Store.

Soon, we will be launching a Christian products online store as well.

Meanwhile, Alyssa continues to teethe and Chase continues to want to stay up late.

Come by and check out my other site for news on daycares, kids and the Internet and abstinence education among other topics.

For you freelance writer mamas, I also have links to a market looking for writers (AssociatedContent.com) and a book review blog looking for reviewers.

I have "met" some great moms through my Homeschool Mom Tips blog so even if you are not homeschooling, come on by and visit.

I will still be updating Joyful Parent but not as often as I used to while we are getting our stores up and running.

It is good to be back.

Homeschool Store Gifts for Grads

My husband, Sam, has designed some fun, bold apparel and accessories for the 2005 homeschool graduate.

Stop by our store and take a look! www.HomeschoolMomStore.com

This store stuff is so much fun! I had forgotten how talented my husband is. 

I do not spend as much time as I should keeping up with what he is doing.  He really is pretty good (and I am not biased at all of course). My son thinks it is pretty cool to have a store. He is just wondering when his t-shirt will come!


 

My Journey to Motherhood-Part 2

I had a hard time accepting what God was trying to tell me. His message for me to embrace distinctly feminine roles was in direct opposition to the values that I held in my heart. I took feminist women's studies courses in college. I knew that it was taboo for a woman to think of her role as wife and mother as being important. In fact, most of my training was an attempt to ensure that I would not be "stuck" in such menial roles. I was taught that a woman had to know herself, live for herself only and reject all societal and religious notions of what a woman should resemble.

"But wait a minute here", I found myself saying. I had done all the right things and I still did not feel so great. Single, with no decent prospects and working up to 100 hours per week completing my medical training, I felt frustrated with my life. Professionally, I was accomplishing so much. That was supposed to be my fulfillment. Why was I still so miserable? Could it be possible that God was right, I stupidly wondered. Did I really need to become a wife and mother in order to be fulfilled?

I began to pray as I had not done regularly for some time. I prayed for God to show me what roles he wanted me to fulfill. I prayed that I would reduce so that he could become more in me. I prayed that I might submit myself to his will so that I might be led to the perfect place where he wanted me to bloom. Was I to remain single and childless or perhaps adopt? Was I to pursue a religious vocation such as becoming a nun? (Yes, I was serious about that- if it was in his will). After an intense period of silence, I began to feel a sense of peace. I still did not have an answer, but I did have a sense of peace. Once I relaxed and stopped trying to figure everything out, I felt that I had received my answer.

I was indeed being called to the roles of mother and wife. Okay, God, I hear you now and I accept what you are saying. There was only one thing still missing- a husband! Now how is God going to make this miracle happen, I wondered.

Christian Homeschool Mom

Check out this story about a Christian homeschooling Mom who recently decided to remove all of her children from public school and homeschool them.

She believes that public schools have an anti-Christian bias. I agree. Despite laws governing free speech in this country, it does seem that Christian students are discouraged from sharing their beliefs in schools for fear of being accused of proselytizing.

However, those sharing other beliefs do not seem to come under the same scrutiny. I recently met a New Age healer who went into the public schools to teach students about energy healing and breathing methods based on Qigong and other Eastern philosophies. I wonder if he would be accused of proselytizing for presenting his strong views about the wonders of the Eastern philosophy he practices. I wonder how many parents knew what he was going to be teaching their children that day.

Public schools are not devoid of religion. The atheism, socialism and secular humanism on which public schools were formed are also belief systems. Parents fool themselves when they think that there is no religion in schools. It may not be Christianity but whenever you are teaching the next generation, morals and values must be communicated to those who are being taught.

If you are a Christian parent who feels spiritual growth and development are an important part of the Biblical mandate for raising children, consider homeschooling your children. One or two hours of Sunday School each week may not be enough. Public education will discourage any attention to spiritual matters whatsoever and your child's heart will not be nourished by the public school environment.

Homeschool Graduate Gifts

I have been very busy working on uploading the images that my husband Sam has designed for the items in our store.

We have just created a bunch of fun homeschool grad gifts and added them to the store. We have wall clocks, mugs, sweatshirts, t-shirts, tank tops, tote bags and more.

Stop by homeschoolmomstore.com and pick up something today.

We have also added some new homeschool dad items just in time for Father's Day. Father's Day is Sunday, June 19, 2005.

Saturday, May 7, 2005

My Road to Motherhood-Part 1

I have had in on my heart to write about my experiences of becoming a wife and mother and how those experiences altered my relationship with God and were affected by my relationship with God. After writing out an extended updated version a few days ago, I felt unsure about posting it for 2 reasons: 1.I thought it was too long and 2.I was not sure that anyone would really want to read it. After all it is my very personal story, probably not very controversial or exciting.

But, I have felt the urging to post it. I have ignored it until today. Kim over at AHA commented that she liked my blog but she wished I would say more about my personal homeschool. I have been feeling more like sharing more of that as well but I feel my current life might be better presented against the backdrop of my former life.

So, here goes...

I found out the other day that a young person I know, a college graduate in her early twenties, was pregnant. She was somewhat hesitant to tell me as she was not planning this pregnancy because she does not feel ready for a baby. I started to remember how I was when I was in my twenties. I was so much like many of the young women I meet today. I was scared of the restrictions and losses that would accompany motherhood. I put it off. "I've got more important things to do right now-school, career, making money. Starting a family can wait." I reasoned. I did not consider any other way.

Yet at the same time, I spent my adult years searching. I was searching for peace, fulfillment, purpose and happiness. This quest occupied much of my time outside of my training and career. Underwhelmed by my church experiences after high school, I had become a sidelined Catholic, a fairly common occurrence. So to the New Age bookstores I fled, chasing after the latest, greatest fad that would fill me with what was missing.

You know what was missing? It was not Yoga or Gregorian chants. It was not creative visualization or Native American drumming. It was not wind chimes or deep breathing. The answer came as a shock to me. No, what was missing was the very thing I had learned was taboo for a modern woman to admit longing for- a commitment to serve those outside of myself by fulfilling the womanly roles of wife and mother that God designed me to excel in achieving.

What? Find fulfillment in service? Become happy by becoming a wife and mother? I was incredulous! I began finding my way back to the God of my childhood in my quest for clarity on this issue and the Truth I had been seeking. My Father in Heaven, who had never left me said "Yes my child. It is true what you have discovered. Now you know your true destiny."

Read more in my next post next time.

Happy Mother's Day everyone!

Homeschool Blog Reviews

Big thanks to Kim over at the AHA site for reviewing my blog and many other homeschool blogs. Her reviews give a good idea of the tone and theme of each blog and I am very grateful for the blogs I have learned about through her blog.

If you would like to have you blog reviewed, go to her personal homeschooling site and drop her an e-mail. Tell her that I sent you!

Mommy Wars?

A recent study shows that moms, like most Americans, feel that the grass is greener on everybody else's lawn than theirs.

Sometimes, I wonder if the emphasis on Mommy Wars is overplayed by the media. I have met some stay-at-home moms that can not stand working moms and vice versa but that seems to be the exception.

I know many more stay-at-home moms that are willing to help a working mom with babysitting in a pinch and working moms who applaud the decision of moms who stay home.

What have your experiences been?

The Good Mother

A friend and I talked today about what it means to be a good mother. Although the specifics of the meaning may vary from mom to mom, it seems obvious that some characteristics of a mom are essential for the proper functioning of a successful society. Moms nurture families and create environments that foster spiritual, intellectual and physical growth of all family members, including herself. When any of these aspects of a mom's life break down, the mom herself begins to breakdown and experience feelings of remorse, shame or guilt.

What is a mom to do? First of all, as a Christian wife and mother, I must constantly remind myself that without Christ, I can do nothing. So, if I begin to have problems fulfilling my roles, I must ask myself where is the Christ in my life. Secondly, I must ask for continual guidance and the molding of my will to God's will as I am working to accomplish all that I do each day. If I am feeling that life is too stressful, chaotic or just unfulfilling, I must find out why that is happening. Jesus came that we should have life and have it abundantly so a life limited by frustration is surely not in His will. Am I actually doing what it is that God has for me to do? Or I am doing too much or too little? Moving too quickly or too slowly? Only through prayer and time with my Bible can I get myself straightened out again.

Most importantly, Moms must remember that although our hearts may be pure, we will still make mistakes. We will sin. We are not bound by our sins. Jesus died on the cross for our sins. If we are willing to ask forgiveness and move in a different direction away from the sin, we can leave that sin behind and live the life that God has planned for us.

Many complain that life for moms is unfair. Too much is expected from moms and moms do not get enough support. "Why should I be expected to play all of these roles? What is in it for me?" The answer we must live the lives that God wants us to live to support his Kingdom. What we get in return is no less than eternal life. And never forget, moms have plenty of support. God will always "have your back" and he will be there for you no matter your circumstance. A lot is expected from moms because we have a lot to give. God will never ask us for more than he knows we can give and he will never place on us more than we can bear.

Our merciful and forgiving God will never shame us or send guilt and condemnation to our door. That is the work of the enemy and should be resisted as such. We may feel convicted to change our ways, leading to a positive move towards God. Feelings of guilt and punishment, however, serve to move us away from God, feeling unworthy of his love and forgiveness.

Today, as we approach Mother's Day, it is my prayer that all the moms reading this blog will grow closer to him so that we might glorify him and server him and our families well all the days of our lives.

Thank you for reading.

Friday, May 6, 2005

Violence in Schools Improving?

This article discusses the "overall improvement" in the rates of school violence in New Jersey.

For all the talk about zero tolerance, the tone of this article feels much like a pat on the back for slight reductions in certain types of violence even while there was an increase in gang and weapon violence.

For an overall reduction in violence of 9%, the education officials interviewed seemed to be fairly satisfied. Of course, remember that these statistics are self-reported (read under-reported) by the individual school districts.

But even if we take the numbers at face value, is this level of violence acceptable? Is any level of violence acceptable in an institution that is mandated to protect our children as it becomes a surrogate parent of sorts?

An even better question is: what if it your child was assaulted in school? I wonder if the improvement in statistical indicators of violence would mean much to you and your family if the unthinkable happened.

Even Rocket Scientists are Doing It

Interesting interview with a NASA scientist who is homeschooling his children.

Cool airplane photos too!

Homeschool Blogger Group Forming

Hat tip to Thicket Dweller over at Today's Lessons for letting me know about a new google group for homeschool bloggers.

I have signed up. Do the same if you are interested.

HSLDA Essay Contest

This essay contest ends soon- on May 31, 2005.

Encourage your kids to enter!

Victory in Courts for Homeschoolers

The court has dropped its actions seeking to invalidate homeschooling as a method of approved education for those receiving benefits from the Veterans Administration.

To summarize in my non-legally educated way: A father was seeking benefits for his son that were available to those receiving an approved education. Homeschool will now be considered an approved education by the VA. For all the legalese details, click here.

I take this victory to be another sign that like it or not, homeschooling is moving into the mainstream.

I pray that veteran homeschoolers will be welcoming to the next wave of diverse homeschoolers. I know that where there is diversity, there can be tension. My prayer is that even though newer homeschoolers may have a variety of reasons for homeschooling and a variety of perspectives, veterans of the movement will be welcoming and supportive.

We can not put the toothpaste back in the tube! Those who fought for homeschooling freedoms won the right for all to homeschool. I hope that all will join us!

Thursday, May 5, 2005

Help a Potential Homeschool Dad Decide

I came across this post on one of the all-time most popular parenting blogs.

This ultra-hip, NYC dad is actually considering homeschooling his daughter.

Well, sort-of.

With considerations such as socialization, sports, influencing his child to think like he does (gasp!) and the trial of living on a single income, he is pretty sure he will not undertake the duties of homeschooling.

Having said all that, MetroDad is very open to comments and suggestions about how to deal with potential obstacles to homeschooling.

If you have a minute, head over there and leave him a tip or two. His daughter will thank you for it!

Wednesday, May 4, 2005

Society is to Blame: We are Society

Once again, another study has come out that shows interesting discrepancies between what parents believe and how they live. This study of mothers finds that mothers are overwhelmingly concerned about society and its negative impact on their children. But the question is what are they doing about it? Reducing TV, increasing monitoring of media such as music and video games and the Internet? Other studies suggest that this is not the case. Mothers in this study report, as many other recent studies of parents have found, they are concerned about the moral life of their children and they feel their children are not receiving enough moral instruction. But in other studies, they readily admit that they as parents spend little to no time instructing their children in moral or ethical issues. The studies are particularly striking in Christian parents who overwhelmingly believe that they should be the ones teaching their children about Jesus Christ but the majority of believers do not. (Barna.org)

Society will only change one family at a time. It is time for us to dust off our history books and remember that true, lasting change only occurs in societies with grassroots efforts. For example, the American Civil Rights Movement would never have begun without the tiny efforts of many. (Everyone from high schoolers up should watch the video series Eyes on the Prize, an excellent documentary of the Civil Rights Movement of the Sixties that does a great job of exposing the grassroots origin of Civil Rights.) Leaders only arose out of the grassroots; they did not swoop down from on high and mobilize people. That means that if I am going to get on my soapbox demanding change, I had better the one out there leading the way.

It is so easy to forget this simple truth as we gripe and complain. Hate the school system? Homeschool. Feel corporate America is unfair? Start your own business. Hate all current politicians? Run for office yourself. Think this country's morality is going down faster than a sinking ship? Revitalize your own spiritual life and teach your children to do the same. Monitor the clothing you wear, the music you listen to and the TV and movies you watch.

The women in the study say that motherhood is the most important role for them. Does their calendar/planner reflect that? They say their marriages are important but how much time and respect are they devoting to their husbands? Does their calendar/planner reflect that?

About work: 83 percent strongly agreed that their care of their children is so unique that "no one else can replace it." Yet 41% worked full-time outside the home. Only 16% of mothers felt that working full-time was ideal. Yet over twice that percentage worked full time.

Most mothers worry about materialism -- 88 percent agreed that "money has too much control over our lives." But what are they doing to reduce the role of materialism in their lives and in the lives of their children.

More than 80 percent agreed that society as a whole should do more to protect children from "adult" aspects of the world. They also felt that society makes it "hard" to protect children. I agree. It is hard. Hard, yes but still necessary. Are these concerned moms considering homeschooling? Do they monitor the media that their children are exposed to at home?

When I speak of the glaring inconsistencies in the lives of the mothers in the study, I speak of myself as well. As a self-appointed critic of many aspects of American life, I must constantly challenge myself and ask those around me to challenge me to remain true to my ideals and to at least attempt to live that which I ask others to live. Of course, we will all fall short at times but the valiant efforts of many will ultimately lead to the change in American society that most parents seek.

Shop Our New Store Today!

Hooray! My husband Sam and I announce the grand opening of our online Homeschool Mom Store. Sam did a terrific job of creating fun designs and putting them on t-shirts, bags, hats and mugs. Check out our new store! Thank goodness one of us is artistic!

Click here to find out more about the story behind our store.

Shop, have fun, show your support for homeschooling and help our family business.

Thank you!

Tuesday, May 3, 2005

Homeschool Mom With the Lord

Thank you all for your prayers for the homeschool mom in our local group struck with cancer. She passed away this afternoon. If you would be so kind, remember the family in your prayers today.

I feel so sad. Some things are so hard to accept...

A View from Inside Schools: More Reasons to Homeschool

So many parents just are not aware of the shaky ground that schools and their methods of instruction are standing on and using as absolute truth. I was one of those parents. I assumed that since school administrators and teachers had degrees, some of them advanced, they must know what they are talking about. How wrong I was. It does not take much research to find out the sorry state of schools of education. The "hot" theory today, after millions of dollars is spent implementing it, becomes tomorrow's mistake. What sounds theoretically sound and worked in one school is passed off as doctrine only to get changed when once again, the (fill-in-the-blank) plan that was going to save the schools was found to be lacking.

From banning red pens, to deleting kickball and recess, schools have become more ridiculous than ever. How much learning is going on in the average school? Not much if you are not a self-starter whose learning style meshes with that of the system.

Parents need to take a much more active role in keeping abreast of education policies and politics. Even if a family is unwilling to homeschool, the parents should take long periods of time devoting themselves to understand the origin and history of schools, the current roles of schools in our society today and whether or not schools are accomplishing what they have set out to accomplish.

It amazes me how much time parents will take to research their favorite sports team or reality TV star or what type of digital TV they will buy. But when it comes to their child's education, many suddenly grow silent and weak. Parents must change before the schools will change. There can be no other way.

Sex With Teachers: Another Reason to Homeschool

Even I was shocked when I realized that over the past few weeks, the city of New York reported 5 incidences of inappropriate sexual behavior between teachers and students. See some of the stories from the New York Daily News here, here and from the New York Post here. (By the way,could stories like these help to explain why public school teachers are loathe to teach about abstinence? Hmmmm, I wonder...) But it got even worse. The mayor of New York, Mayor Bloomberg, admitted that such occurrences happen regularly only the press does not always find out about it. But wait, the stories get even worse. Once the offending teacher is exposed, he or she typically gets a slap on the hand and is sent right back into the classroom. Think it can not get any worse than that? Guess again. The teacher's unions refuse to add any teeth to the disciplinary action to punish sexual offender teachers because of the chance that a student might just make up a story to hurt a teacher. They do not want any teachers being wrongfully disciplined.

Okay, can we all see what happens here? First we start with students not being safe in their own school, at the institution they come to for learning. This is in direct contrast to opponents of homeschooling who point to the relative safety of schools in which students are free from the horrible abuses that can occur at home.

In fact, CBS News, The Akron Beacon Journal and others have run "investigative reports" that have suggested the opposite. Homeschooling, we were warned, merely serves as a haven for those who would misuse or abuse their children. If children were sent to school, the school proponents argue, any abuse could be quickly discovered and indeed, parents may not be abusive at all because they would be aware that they could be "found out".

The statistics just make you feel all warm and fuzzy thinking about sending your child into the safe confines of public school right? In this age of accountability spurred by No Child Left Behind (NCLB), our upright schools have taken to out and out lying to suppress the number of violent incidents occurring so that schools can maintain their "safe" school status.

I wish I could just stay focused on the self-serving bureaucrats allowing children to be harmed in school each day all around the country. For I would rather feel anger toward them than the sadness that grips my heart when I think of defenseless children, abandoned in public schools for "their own good" by the parents whose charge it is to protect and teach them.

Homeschooling is certainly not easy and homeschoolers are not perfect. Yet is time for more parents to step up to the plate and face reality in admitting that the archaic, failing system of compulsory education is not good for kids. It just is not.

Monday, May 2, 2005

National Mother of the Year

Nice article here about a 72-year old who was named Mother of the Year. Seems that she has some good old-fashioned advice about caring enough about your children to instill morals and values in them. Perhaps the most impressive and important part of the award is that the winner will go around the country and speak about the importance of motherhood, a role that has been much-maligned since the rise of feminism.

Sunday, May 1, 2005

Prayers for Ill Homeschool Mom

I have a heavy heart today despite an awesome service at church this morning. One of the local homeschool moms here is very ill with cancer. I am resisting feelings of despair and defeat because I have promised to pray for her and her family. I know that my faith has to be front and center. So I plod on, asking God to give me the strength to carry on and continue to believe for her healing.

This morning at church we had a guest speaker (Gary Spicer from England) who talked about the difficult circumstances that even the staunchest of believers will face. He discussed examples from his own life of how some prayers are answered and illnesses are healed while in other cases prayers seem to go unheeded.

He did not offer any pat rationalizations for these occurrences. He only reminded us that regardless of how our circumstances may appear, we have a choice. In every instance we have a choice of how to respond to life's circumstances and we can do so through the lens of faith or through the lens of negativity.

His words particularly touched me this morning.

Homeschooling is very important to me, both personally and for its role in American society. I feel called to mother, write, teach and preach and I am not sure exactly how those roles are to be fulfilled. Our family's financial situation is precarious at best. The house is too messy and Chase did not practice his writing yesterday.

The above-mentioned items are nothing, nothing at all in the life plan that God has for me. Small potatoes, those things! I am here to live life abundantly, no matter what and to serve Him in whatever way I can all the time. I am to worry and be anxious for nothing. I will seek Him and His Kingdom and let Him do the rest.

I assume a humble posture of gratitude as I acknowledge all the blessings God Has poured upon me and my family and I am practically breathless at the remembering. I mighty God indeed and I will remain in His shadow for life.

I also ask that anyone reading this blog would pray for Cathy, a fellow Christian homeschool mom. Please pray for her complete healing, pray for her children and for her husband. Thank you so much and may God richly bless you and keep you.